JOURNAL ENTRY #1
Where to start… Things have been so difficult here lately. It's mostly Mom. I am so worried about her. She's been so down on herself lately. Her disease is really getting to her. It's been getting a lot worse and her communication skills keep getting worse and worse. Not only does she become irritable over the smallest things, but she also lacks facial expressions and speaks in a very quiet voice. She's a lot more shaky; it's even affected her hand writing (NINDS, 2002). I'm just not used to all these changes. I talked to her doctor the other day and he suggested that she see a speech-language pathologist (Parkinson's Disease Foundation, 2002). I'm not really sure about that. I didn't know that a speech therapist handles these types of problems. There is a speech therapist that works at the kids' elementary school, but my mother's problems are different from those children's. The doctor gave me a name of a therapist that is highly recommended for patients who have neurological problems. Maybe I will give it a try; the doctor seemed to think it was a good idea that we set up an appointment to see her.

JOURNAL ENTRY#2
I just got back from mom's speech therapy session. I am so glad that we decided to go and see a speech therapist. When mom's disease started to get worse, I began to notice difficulty with her speech. It has been very frustrating for her & me too. I never really thought to go to one, but I am glad that we did. Even though she has had PD for a while, the therapy seems to be very helpful. She sounds a lot clearer now than she did the last time I wrote in my journal. I was starting to get so worried about her. Sometimes when she would talk I wouldn't be able to understand her. Her voice was so quiet and she mumbled a lot (Kleinow, Smith, Ramig, 2001). She would get so frustrated with me, but I didn't know what to do about it.

At therapy she learned how to emphasize her sounds more (Sharkawi, Ramig, Logemann, Pauloski, Rademaker, Smith, Pawlas, Baum, Werner, 2002). I am so proud of her! She's done such a good job with that. It is such a horrible feeling when someone you love wants to tell you something or needs something and you can't understand what it is. That is one of the things that I hated most. For example, a couple of weeks ago, Mom was trying to tell me a story. When she started telling it, her voice was really soft and her speech gradually started to get slower. About half way through the story, she lost track of thought (NINDS, 2002). I tried to help her out, but I couldn't really understand her when she started telling the story, so I didn't know what to do. It was one of the only times when I felt awkward around my mother. I knew she knew what was going on, so I didn't want to just change the subject. At that point, I really wished I could have at least had a clue as to what she was talking about so that I could help her out. Now that we have been seeing an SLP, I am able to hear her. Going to therapy has been so helpful!

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This week I did not accomplish any of my goals. In fact, I did the exact opposite. This week I wanted to get my assignments done before Friday or at least most of them & my other goal was to not get so worried about this class. Obviously, I did not get my first goal done. Everyday this week I planned to work on 315 stuff, but when it came time to, I either had other work to do for classes that were due the next day, or I just could not bring myself to do them. And my other goal was not even close to being reached. This week was probably the most stressful week I’ve had. Let me tell ya, this week was not fun! I just felt like I had so much to do and could not get it done. When I first looked at all the assignments, I wasn’t worried because there weren’t that many, but then I found out that the next weeks assignments were also due at the end of this week… so of coarse I started worrying again. I really wasn’t looking forward to doing the first genre, but I ended up doing a Cinguain poem and an Acrostic poem ( I can’t figure out which one to use)—I actually just got done with it, and it wasn’t that bad. I haven’t started on the Week 7 assignments so I guess I’ll see how that goes… oh boy!! In conclusion, my goal next week will be to 1)get the assignments done before Friday & 2)NOT stress so much!!!

TALKING
Becomes harder,
Tricky, tough, frustrating,
People cannot understand me;
Awkward.

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